Unrooted
by Fritter Critter
Summary: When things and people start going missing, Dib finds that something beyond paranormal interference going on within the town he lives in. Gaz is being unusually quiet, Bigfeets are running rampant, and just what does Zim think he's DOING with this plan of his? [Some prickly ZaDf, no romance. Rated T for some aggressive themes and violence.]


Dib heard a small clunk.

He looked up from the UFO-zine he was reading, startled by the small sound. It was the sound of chalk dropping from the place it had originally been held, the sound of it scraping against the chalkboard in a last second effort to make an imprint before it hit the ground. It was now lying in a pathetic display of two small pieces, fractured with shattered bits of its own dust being the only deathbed it could be given.

To be truthfully honest, Dib hadn't really been trying to listen to the lesson. Between his glares being met with a certain alien's and trying to figure out the mystery of the so called "Sailing Stones"(which was the cover story for this particular magazine) before he finished the article, it wasn't the highest thing on his agenda. But now the lesson, or, what was left of it, had him captivated.

"She's...gone," Dib whispered. What used to be a miserable pile of haggard wrinkles and old age, tinted with only her gray hair and hatred for everything mankind had to offer, was no longer within the room. The only proof that she was even here to begin with was the metallic name plate inscribed "Ms. Bitters" towards the front of her desk and the ever-present rotten apple to the far right corner, a small green worm poking out of the withered fruit. Dib stared in confusion, eyeing the board that had been in the progress of being labeled "The War Of The Worlds". It had been their homework to read the first and last chapter, some how being able to circumscribe the events between the two covers with only those pages. This, of course, was impossible to begin with, but that was besides the point.

The words had ended off at "War Of T", with only a half finished T. This might lead the reader to believe, if not informed as they were above, that she could have been writing "War Of Testosterone" or "War Of The Bunnies", maybe something even more ridiculous than that. Perhaps "War Of The Testosterone Prone Bunnies", which could be assumed to be a war about very manly bunnies somehow fighting a war over who would get the pretty female bunnies to the side. But, with absurd assumptions aside, the facts were that Ms. Bitters was not there anymore and nobody was doing anything about it. Dib wanted to say something, but bit his tongue as the kids around him continued their chatter with no hindrance.

There were many reasons for this biting of his tongue. ONE: He was considered insane by his somewhat unbelievable ramblings in the past, making him an unreliable resource for information, anyways. TWO: Ms. Bitters was prone to disappearing then reappearing just as quickly, moving extremely fast. Dib had wondered, multiple times, if this might have been because she could have possibly been something more than just a human, but his questioning had always been quickly silenced by a very inhuman growl coming from the demon herself. This was counterproductive, though, simply reinforcing Dib's musings. THREE: Nobody cared to pay attention, anyways. They'd probably just throw some crude contraption made from paper at him, inevitably causing Dib more pain and suffering than needed.

But there was an exception to the last one. Dib realized this as soon as those scanner-like eyes of his hit the northeast corner of the room. The green child with his odd triangular, pink clothes and metal contraption strapped to his back(which Dib, from the past few months, had identified as a 'Pak') sat idly, staring towards the front of the room. He was hunched over, looking over blueprints for a nasty machine that Dib knew had something to do with taking over the Earth. But beneath his simple disguise of contacts and a black wig with an Elvis style cut, there lay a flicker of uncertainty. A doubt that hadn't been there before. His purple eye contact lenses covered it perfectly, not giving even a moment's notice. They still scowered the lengths of the blueprints, but now in a preoccupied way, only tracing the edges. His three clawed hands had moved from holding the pages still to clasping one another. His sleek black combat boots tapped the floor.

Anyone else amongst the noise and clatter of the classroom as it was would not have noticed these small changes in the Alien's behavior. They wouldn't of cared.

But Dib cared. He cared because for the past two years of his life he'd been watching this alien. Studying him. Once and awhile getting up close and personal with him, or the other way around. He cared because he was the only one who knew the truth about this dirty liar and his despicable plans to conquer the planet, each one only stopped because Dib had stepped in. You could say he was the savior of the Earth. No one else would agree with that statement, though, because none of them believed in "silly little stories".

This was why Dib, even if the others had dismissed Zim's absent minded behavior, was looking for something more. Something he knew existed beyond what most of the humans saw him as.

There. A twitch within the forests of fake hair glued into the wig the presided on his head. Dib had seen it before, but only during fights or unfortunate encounters beyond the somewhat(not really) protective walls of the Skool. Small amounts of relaxation, which was very rare from Zim, could allow the alien's disguise to loosen up a bit. He'd scratch his wig, or rub his eyes, and then you could see it. A peek of a ruby colored orb that proved to act as Zim's eyes, a slip of the long, black antennae that ran off his head buried between his wig. Very hard to notice unless you were actually, thoroughly looking. The antenna was out now; the left one, quivering with a sudden concern for his surroundings.

Zim's eyes narrowed, and he looked up from his blueprints. He, too, looked over the room, wondering where the old crone had went off to. Confusion, however hard it was to read, played out on his face. Dib had learned a long time back that it takes an expert to read such a face, so void of emotion. The slightest of movements needed to be calculated, adding in the body posture and position of his eyes. Luckily, Dib was just the expert needed in such a situation, and by now he had figured out that Zim had noticed the change as well.

Ms. Bitters was still not there. She would have reappeared by now. Surely that much was true. Dib still saw very little signs from his class that they were paying attention. He frowned, putting down his UFO-zine and picking up his pencil. He scribbled down a few words and folded the paper precisely, knowing the even though Zim could probably hear him loud and clear if he just whispered through this clamor, Zim would be very distracted. Dib did not want to drag more attention to him than needed.

He finished a partial paper airplane, rubbing his chin and evaluating it. It was...childish looking, but not horrible. It would do.

He crossed his fingers in hope, launching towards the Irken. It landed behind him, right past Rita and into a wall. She was talking about nails with one of her popular friends. Zim seemed to notice the mislaunched paper airplane, raising his head and looking at Dib. For once, the look was not filled with hatred and malice, but instead with pure curiosity. He looked to the airplane, and then folded his arms, leaning back in his seat.

It was obvious he was not going to go pick it up. Dib gritted his teeth, a horrible grinding sound emitting from them. He was playing hard to get. Stupid alien.

Dib grumbled, ripping out another piece of paper from his binder and rewriting his letter. His eyes slowly slid across the page, reading it again.

_Dear Dirty Alien Scum,_

_You saw that, right? Is she really just...gone? I'm asking you only because of you're heightened senses. Really, I perfer pretty much anyone else in this room BUT you to ask._

_(PS: You're antennae are sticking out of your wig, dork.)_

_Signed,_

_Your Worst and Forever More Enemy_

Dib liked the way he worded it. With a grin and not another thought, he once again let it fly towards Zim. This time it landed pretty close to its target: right on his forehead. Dib had been aiming for the eye, but he'd take whatever he could get.

Zim looked a little startled, letting the paper machine fall ontop of his blueprints. But then he snatched it up, glaring at Dib as he unfolded the crisp lines. He seemed to read through it carefully, tracing one claw across each line. He had a surprised look on his face as he reached the last line, quickly adjusting his wig. Zim's gaze met Dib's, his mouth turned down into a scowl that looked like it came off the devil himself. They continued to look at each other. Zim. Dib. Zim. Dib. Zim. Dib grinned ever so slightly. That's right, lizard boy. I saw that. And next time it happens I'll be sure to expose you for the alien menace you are.

Zim's face flushed a light pink when Dib smiled at him, making Dib laugh. Zim shook his head and, with a final glare at Dib, he turned the paper over, taking a pencil out of his Pak and immediately getting to writing his reply with a hardened face of what could only be descirbed as "Zim Anger". This was mainly because Zim was the only one Dib knew that could pull off such a look of pure fury.

Zim didn't even try to fold the lines back into place- he crumpled it up into a ball and chucked it as hard as he could to the other side of the room. It hit the window next to Dib's head, miraculously missing the over sized mass of head that it was, and landing with a thunk onto Dib's desk. Dib looked to Zim. He was obviously avoiding Dib's gaze, sticking to glaring at the wall. Dib slowly uncrumpled the ball, but paused as he heard something. Was that...car alarms? Dib shook his head. Whatever it was, the police or whoever cared about those things could handle it.

_Dear Sniveling Human Worm Baby,_

_Of course Zim saw it. Do you think of Zim as an idiot?_

_Honestly, child, Zim knows exactly how many of you are in this room at all times. How would he not be able to? You all smell like...fiiiiilth..._

He could literally hear Zim gagging at this point.

_Disgusting. Zim can smell what you've eaten for the last three days, the conditioner and shampoo each of you use, the last time you've washed the sheets of your sleeping..chamber. Zim can hear you within two miles of the skool with perfect clarity. I know everything that goes on in this skool at all times. _

Dib shuttered at that thought. Revolting. What could Zim do with that kind of information? Probably lots of evil alien things.

_With that fact in mind, remember that Zim has also taken his own sweet time to ensure that you would not go sneaking around with his own information. Thus, it makes Zim saddened that you have already caught on to details that Zim does not notice himself. Perhaps I am getting too...used to the relaxed way things are on this planet. Take note that Zim will be stepping up his game._

_But, yes. Zim did notice. Strange. The old hag isn't hiding anywhere in the skool building. I haven't found her scent anywhere. And for someone just to...disappear..._

_It definitely smells like fish. _

_Signed,_

_Your Slave Master and Horrible Doom_

_( PS: Your concern for Zim's saftey is noted, worm. :p)_

Dib sighed, running his hands through his hair. So he saw, through the labyrinth of insults Zim just threw at him, that Zim had also seen their teacher 'poof'. He wasn't insane. That was good.

The bad part? The only person that believed him was his worst enemy, an ALIEN, who was trying to take over Earth.

Dib started writing down his reply.

_Dear Jerkface, _

_Concern my butt. That was a warning._

_So what do you think happened to her? She can't of just disappeared in thin air! And even if she did, what then? The kids aren't doing anything, and someone is supposed to be teachin_

That was as far as Dib got before the door burst open. A somewhat small female stood in it's doorway, glaring down on the class with her eyes squeezed shut. Her purple fang-like hair hung down over her face, casting a shadow over her eyes and doubling the spookiness that wavered in the air at her presence. Zim immediately cringed away, scooting back as far away from her as possible.

Gaz. Dib raised an eyebrow. Her reason for being here did not help Dib's suspicions for what had happened to Miss Bitters.

Gaz opened one eye to glare hard at Dib. Yeah. That whole "Zim Angry" thing that only Zim could wear? Dib was wrong. There was one other person that could wear that face, and she did it pretty dang well. "Where is my teacher, Dib?" Her tone froze every poor soul in this classroom down to the very core.

Dib gulped. "Uh...teacher?"

"Mr. Elliot," Gaz hissed out. "Where is he? Did you cast one of your stupid spells on him or something? Did your alien abduct him?"

Now everyone seemed to notice the fact the Miss Bitter was also plainly missing. Whispers crowded the background as Dib tried to focus on Gaz's face instead of psycho analyzing every conversation that rang out around him. Zim seemed more interested in Dib's response than the rest of the class, almost as if he wanted Dib to have an answer for the question.

"I...don't know."

Gaz trained her gaze on him. She didn't believe him. "What about your teacher?" She shot one hand out, the one that the Gameslave 4 was lodged in. It pointed to the unfinished word on the chalkboard and the broken piece of chalk that sat on the floor.

Dib shrugged. Gaz opened her other eye now, undeterred by her brother's sudden antisocial behavior. She turned around, seeing as she would get nothing out of the class she stood in. Before she walked out, though, a certain green alien had found his way out of his seat to face her.

The difference between the two was hysterical- a thirteen year old girl, almost six feet tall, who looked like she could have been the leader of a mafia and a two hundred and seventy something year old alien who was only three feet tall and acted like a child half the time. Zim stood in front of her, blocking her exit. Not like that could do much.

"Where are you going, little Gaz?"

"Somewhere your face isn't messing up my view."

Zim frowned at this as he was pushed aside. Gaz continued her walk. Dib jumped out of his seat as she walked off, knowing he would have far better of a time discussing this with his sister than the idiots in this classroom. "Wait up! Gaz!"

It was obvious that she wasn't waiting for anybody. Dib struggled to catch up with her as Zim slowly followed, twenty three heads watching them leave from the inside of the classroom.


End file.
